Mirror, mirror on the wall. Is that me?

For most of my life, the answer to that question was no one … because my eyes were closed. It’s a great coping mechanism for someone like me who can only see flaws. I’d include a list of those flaws here but it’s long and depressing. Besides, I’m guessing many of you have a list of your own and don’t need to hear mine.

I expected lots of things when I started the Fittest Loser Challenge, but facing all the mirrors has been about the hardest. The walls at Push Fitness are covered with floor-to-ceiling mirrors. At boot camp, we face another wall of mirrors. I wonder what genius came up with the idea that watching yourself in an array of unflattering positions was somehow helpful?

Pretty quickly I found out it was really hard to keep my eyes closed and execute a workout with all the moves my trainer Tony requires. I tried. I lost my balance … a lot. Partly because of my legendary lack of coordination, but mostly because I’d close my eyes and lose track of where I was in the space allotted.

So, I had to open my eyes and there were those darn mirrors … documenting every clumsy move I made. Not to mention the jiggling thighs and, well, I’ll spare you the visual image of the consequences on the upper body of repeatedly jumping up and down.

The only reason I ever opened my eyes in front of a mirror was to check my hair and apply makeup. Imagine how frightening it is to see wild, disheveled, sweaty hair surrounding a face with absolutely no hint of camouflage. Scares the heck out of me every time.

Then at last week’s boot camp something amazing happened. I caught a glimpse of me doing one of Tony’s crazy kicks. I didn’t recognize the woman in the mirror. She was keeping time, her form was decent and best of all, Tony walked by and said, “nice, you’ve got it.” He was talking to me.

Could that really be me in the mirror?

Originally, I thought I’d open my eyes at the end of the competition and see what had happened over the previous 12 weeks. But, here I was eight weeks in and the woman looking back at me was barely recognizable. If I really tried, I could find flaws, but Tony was already on to the next exercise and I was on a roll. I had no time to listen to the critic.

As I left boot camp that day, my cell phone rang. It was my daughter making her weekly post-boot camp call to make sure I survived. Still struggling to catch my breath from Tony’s killer workout, I couldn’t wait to tell her what I had discovered. “Today, I looked in the mirror and you won’t believe who I saw!”

I think I’ll keep my eyes open and see what else I’ve been missing.

My daughter was happy to hear that, especially because I was driving at the time.